- CHUCK NORRIS does't do DELETEs. He just look to the registers, and they run away in fear.
- CHUCK NORRIS does't use PKs. The registers just don't dare to duplicate.
- CHUCK NORRIS does't use LOG. He just remember every register he changed.
- CHUCK NORRIS does't use LOG. He won't fail at all, you know.
- CHUCK NORRIS does't create INDEXes. He know the registers will return as fast as they can anyway.
- MSSQL SERVER is MUCH FASTER than ORACLE. If the DBA is CHUCK NORRIS.
- Once the ROUNDHOUSE KICK was ported to ORACLE. That's how TRUCATE TABLE was born.
- CHUCK NORRIS does't do DROP TABLE. He does ROUNDHOUSE KICK TABLE.
- Once CHUCK NORRIS gave an ROUNDHOUSE KICK in a powerfull database. Today we call it ACCESS.
- CHUCK NORRIS knows every ORACLE error. Just because he invented them all.
- SELECT SUM(STRENGHT) FROM CHUCK_NORRIS; Internal error. Don't call the support.
- EXEC CHUCK_NORRIS; Drop database sucessful.
- SELECT ROUNDHOUSE_KICK FROM CHUC... Lost connection.
- DELETE FROM CHUCK_NORRIS. Not Found. (He is just behind you, ready to do a ROUNDHOUSE KICK!)
- CHUCK NORRIS has automatic IGNORE CONSTRAINTS. No one dare to contraint CHUCK NORRIS. No one.
- CHUCK NORRIS does't take classes about ORACLE. ORACLE take classes from CHUCK NORRIS.
- CHUCK NORRIS installs ORACLE without reading the manual (Who are you to dare do it?)
- CHUCK NORRIS installs ORACLE in a 486. Running Knoppix. In 2 minutes.
- CHUCK NORRIS installs MSSQL SERVER in a Pentium 100MHZ. Running SOLARIS. From the sources.
- CHUCK NORRIS installs DB2 in a 486. Running WINDOWS VISTA. No HD.
- CHUCK NORRIS does't has Certifications. The Enterprises themselves try to Certificate in CHUCK NORRIS. Their
mistake.
- If you say to CHUCK NORRIS "The problem is in the Database", it's better if you mean Bank Boston.
- CHUCK NORRIS __KNOWS__ what is the problem with the database. He is just giving it a chance to regret. 5...
4... 3...
- CHUCK NORRIS does't create STORED PROCEDURES. All his queries autostore themselves in the database, trying to
hide. But it's futile.
- TRRIGERS has this name because CHUCK NORRIS always threaten the server with a pistol when he wanted something
to be done automatically.
- CHUCK NORRIS does't create Database Models. He just face the database until the model is done by itself.
- CHUCK NORRIS installs ORACLE withou the GUI. And without the CLI. (You ask him!)
- Byte, Kilobyte, Megabyte, Gigabyte, Terabyte, Petabyte, Exabyte, CHUCKbite.
- ORACLE has the EXPRESS, STANDARD, ENTERPRISE, and CHUCK NORRIS Editions. But there is no computer fast enough
to run the later.



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